Sorry, it's been a while...

Haha sorry i haven't actually blogged in awhile (not that too many people would miss me, i only have two followers xD) I was too busy starting my freshman year of high school, sorry for any inconvenience... (that was a joke. haha.)

So anyway, i don't usually have time during the week to get on my laptop because of soccer (more latter) and homework. I was actually a wreck the first week because I was so stressed, I wasn't getting enough sleep, and I got sick, and people kinda make me nervous xP
But today I got online and saw I got an email notifying me that I got a comment on my Maximum Ride User Casting wall, from someone congratulating me on making the top five in the Nudge auditions. I only have one audition video up, so i was like whaaat?? And it wasn't even a Nudge monologue.. it was an Ella Monologue... (I mean, I have more audition videos, but I haven't put them on my computer yet.)

Also, on Wednesday, I had my first soccer game of the season. Probably the worst game I've ever attended. I can't say that I contributed to the loss, because my coach never put me in. I give away half my summer to her, and she doesn't even put me in. And it isn't because I'm a sucky player (I'm like fourth from the bottom...) it's mostly because this coach is new, so she didn't want to make cuts, but there weren't enough players for a JV and Varsity team, she just kept all the players and put em on one team. Not smart. There was like ten of us that never got to play. Including my friend, Kat, who was like a great starting midfielder last year. Still pretty pissed. But I'll get over it. If she lets me play. Eventually.

^Maile!^

Likes and Dislikes?

Do likes and dislikes distinguish a person for what STEREOTYPE they fit under? (I'm starting to capitalize it.) Because if they do, I guess I'd fit under lots of different STEREOTYPES. I know, I've had STEREOTYPES on the brain for the past few days... actually, most of the summer. Because you know... high school and all. I kinda wonder if high school is REALLY like they portray in those "reality" tv shows. (you know which ones that cause me to put quotation marks around reality) Because in a town as small as mine, it's kinda hard to believe that my high school could be filled with so much drama. And if there is, I probably never got into it, because I never knew about it. Yeah, I'm pretty out of the loop.

But hey, I found this backpack online that I really want!!!



yeah, pokemon! I know, I am a dork n___0

^Maile!^

I'm Back!

Stereotypes... one of those things that you believe in, or say you don't believe in to be "one of those people that don't care about what people think about me" kinda people. Truth is, stereotypes are unavoidable. Unless you live in a cave all by yourself I guess... Cliques, too. Just feeling kinda thinky cuz I start high school next Tuesday. Well I guess in a week now, cuz it's 12:03 in the morning. I know, I've been saying I'm excited, but now that it's really right around the corner, I'm a little nervous. I didn't get to go to orientation because I was at Holt Camp (aka, best camp EVER, i miss my cabin girls! also, it's kinda weird being surrounded by white people again. idk... maybe it's just me) but I have an appointment for like 12 something today. Hopefully I'm awake -___- but most of all, I MISS MY FRIENDS!!!! one of my BESTEST guy friends, William, has been in Vietnam ALL summer! He gets back like three days before school starts!!!!! D'x I haven't seen him at ALL this summer, and I miss him so much TT_TT

And first day back at soccer today, and I got punished along with the team because they left trash. 2 minutes of team pushups. may not sound really bad, but trust me, even the seniors were hurting a little. and there was this new girl that must've just shown up for tryouts (which I missed, but they're not making cuts) and not conditioning, cuz I've never seen her before in my life.... and I don't wanna sound rude, but she's not the best. She had her toe under the ball and was flicking it up, and she asked me, "Why does it keep going up like that?" -__- well, according to physics, if you use force while moving in an upward motion, that thing's probably gonna go up too. Just sayin'. But she has the coolest glasses, and seems pretty ok.

It's been a while... I feel like I haven't awkwardly blogged in a long time... i miss you.

Oh, I started watching Shane Dawson videos on YouTube, listening to nevershoutnever, and I know the first few words to a Justin Bieber song. Yes. How one can change in a single week of being gone.

^Maile!^

Sorry the last post was a BUM-MER!

bummer. summer. haha.
I know I've said this a THOUSAND times, but I want to go back to school.
Since soccer started, I guess I see some of my friends more often, but while getting hot and sweaty. (but I got out of doing suicides today because I had work done on my knees today. the metal tools of DOOM... I had a bruise before I even left the hospital.) And soccer is fun and all, but I don't get to see the all the people I want to see... plus in high school the teams aren't co-ed. xD
I don't have to much to say today, I'm just doing this because I'm pretty bored and can't sleep. I just wanna apologize for being such a DOWNER yesterday.

^Maile!^

I want to go back to school

for the record, two of my favorite days in the school year is the first day and the last day. all the other days in between are a roller coaster. but it's better than being stuck inside cleaning your room or just waiting to die. (Which, is almost a step up from what I've been doing this summer) Tomorrow my mom is going to make me spend the day cleaning and cleaning and cleaning. which is definitely not my first choice of how to spend my day after soccer conditioning. since no one ever shows up, those that come have to run. how's that fair? it's not. Emily (the senior that works us a little harder) says she doesn't give a damn about people who don't show up, as long as she's in shape. I don't know about her, but if I were the senior in this picture, I'd be nicer to all the new freshman who probably haven't been forced to run like this ever in their lives. In all my years of playing soccer, I'll admit to never having to run this much. And this isn't even official practice. It's run only by the seniors. I guess it is completely optional, but come on. the least the others can do is show up once a week.
So, so far my summer is a total waste of my time. I mean, yeah, I've gotten a lot done compared to some of my peers, like I've almost finished a complete book series, drawn and painted more in the past two months than usual, and started learning a third language, but still. I'm not... como se dice.. a social butterfly. Usually, the only social interaction I get is from the people I hang out with or talk to at school. Which, again, I'll admit is not very many. I've had friends that call me antisocial to my face. It doesn't really phase me, to be honest, but you know, it's one of those things that you just blow off until times when you actually realize it's true. I spent the entire summer after sixth grade cooped up in my closet. Yes, my closet. And it wasn't even a walk in closet. Just a closet with my clothes and stuff pushed to the side so I could sit. I usually talked to myself while doing miscellaneous stuff, like doodling or cutting paper. Well, actually I put posters of people on my wall and pretended they could hear me. So technically, I wasn't talking JUST to myself. Isn't that sad? I even read my old school notes when I get bored sometimes. I mean, I guess this blog is a step up from talking to myself, but I tend to get a little bit rant-y and completely oblivious that someone can ACTUALLY be reading this. Oh well, now that I'm aware of it, I guess I'll go rant somewhere else.

^Maile!^

something I've been wanted to get off my chest...

backstory time!:

"You see this?" he pointed to his nose and asked me.
I rolled my eyes, "yeah, what?"
"Do you know what this is?" It was his nose, duh.
"A bunch of red little dots?" I answered, annoyed. (i was referring to his multiple zits. cuz I'm mean like that.)
He rolled his eyes this time and said, "No, it's a nose." but before i could say duh, he said, "and it's shaped RIGHT."
I knew he was referring to my flat nose. I'm Asian, it's not one of those things I'd like to change about myself. But hey, he didn't need to go around saying my nose is oddly shaped.
Who is he to be insulting my race? Our noses AREN'T formed wrong, its just the way we are.
I'm sick of all the Asian stereotypes that people make up. Like, oh, you're Asian, you must be good at math and science. Oh, you're Asian, you must play piano/be really good at drawing/study too much/play tennis/ice skate. Not that those are necessarily bad things to do, but still.
And the whole squinty eyes thing. Again, it's who we are. I've had friends that do the whole pulling their eyes back to look Chinese thing. I also hate that when people just automatically think you're Chinese or Japanese if you look Asian. I am 100% Vietnamese, thank you very much. (well as far as i know. I'm adopted) And all the "Made in China" stuff. I read this quote somewhere that said, "Fake hair? Fake Tan? Fake boobs? Where's you're Made in China sticker?" I know, that a lot of products were made in China, but that doesn't mean they make fake things. I don't know, some people may see it as whatever, but i thought it was really stupid, and would not have it in any Polyvore set of mine.
And I've gotten a Vietnamese sweat shop joke once too. It hurt a little. Like gee, think about my feelings, thanks.
And i know a lot of my friends that are Asian deal with shit like this too. Some complain that people think they're goth, or need to smile more. actually, a lot complain about people telling them to smile more. I could make a list, but i don't feel like mentioning a whole bunch of names. My take on it: I'm concentrating. sorry, Mr. (English Teacher), that I don't smile when I'm listening to you read aloud or when I'm taking a Literature Test. And I'm sorry that I wore a black t-shirt that one day. My bad.
But seriously, I never really dealt with this in elementary school. I feel like it's getting worse as we're getting older. Like, as we get older we actually LOOSE that voice inside our heads that tell us right from wrong. I know, we probably get it back gradually as we become adults (and some don't) but what the fuck. (excuse my language) I'll admit to being a goth at some point in my life, but I grew up, and got over showing my depression through dark clothing persona. So back the fuck off.

I don't really know why all this is floating in my brain right now, but it's making me really frustrated. And I need to be awake in less than six hours to go to conditioning. So i thought I'd get it off my chest.

If i could cut time out, I'd skip right to August 8th (start of Asian adoptee camp. yeah. we gots our own camp.n_n) so I can go to camp for that week, then come back and have a week before school starts. The only reason i don't cut that week out, is because I want one last week to cram with laziness (oxymoron) and to go shopping with my best friend, Devany Howard. (She's going to the Asian adoptee camp with me. She was adopted from China.)

^Maile!^

To be honest...

I am so tired of summer. I want to go back to school. There! I said it! I don't like summer. I don't get a lot done, and honestly, I'm just a lazy stump all summer. I wish my school was like those schools that have school year-round, but have short breaks throughout the year. I think three months off of school is stupid!! Its like working out hard for three weeks, and doing absolutely nothing for the next week.. you think you're in shape, and you are compared to people who never work out, but after that one week of doing nothing, you are completely out of shape. I can guarantee 93% of the kids in my class won't do anything to stimulate their brains most of the summer. Me included. I haven't looked over any of my notes from the previous school year, or done any math exercises or anything like that. The only thing I've studied all summer is the zodiac, and i don't think they have any freshmen classes on astrology.
But don't get me wrong, I like breaks from school. I like not having homework, or having to think about people I don't particularly like, or studying for tests/quizzes/exams. But I just wish the breaks were more spread out. it doesn't make sense to spread nutella all over your toast except for a circle in the middle. i don't know, it may be just me and my opinion. (when you read opinion really fast, it looks like onion kinda.)